We are Darren and Angela; pilgrims on a journey that has taken us to many different places and involved many different people. We invite you to read about them here.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Home on the Range
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Tearful Goodbyes
After a very difficult week of good-byes, we have arrived in
Yaoundé with our dog Koko in tow, awaiting our flight to
Canada on Friday. It is hard to say where home is now.
When we first set out for CAR one of our main motivations
was to learn the ropes of agricultural missions, to help out
Roy Danforth and to seek further direction for our future
careers. I dont think it ever occurred to me that I
would want to stay in CAR, nor have my heart captured by the
people of Gamboula.
On the contrary, if I could have found some way to hang on I
would have. I have never felt such heart break in my life
that I can remember. Leaving Canada or ECHO did not feel
like this. I am so thankful for our two years in CAR and I
am looking forward to going back. There is no shortage of
need for missionaries and development practitioners in CAR
and if God allows, I intend to be among those meeting the
need.
Our last week was busy with packing although, I have to
admit that I had very little to do with packing down the
house. Darren, bless his heart, saw how much I was grieving
at having to leave behind such good family and friends that
he gave me the week to do what I needed to do and he took
care of nearly everything else. I have such an awesome
husband. We had a party at Clarisses house with all the
Nguebe family in the Gamboula area as well as her sister who
arrived from Bangui after an 8 year absence right in time
for our party. We fed 54 Nguebes, and that was only half
the family. Not unlike what a Coupe family reunion would be
like. Next we had a party with our ladies bible study, each
one bringing something to share around the table. Thursday
was a big day at our house as I got my hair braided by
Nadege and Clarisse. It took a total of nearly seven hours
but I am so happy with it and am determined to keep it in
until mid December. Friday, December first is the biggest
national holiday in CAR. The big thing to do on the first
is to be in the parade. Leonard, Nadege and I made uniforms
for all the workers with their names hand embroidered onto
their shirts and complete with ECHO hats. We loaded up the
agroforestry golf cart into the back of the truck and I
drove it at the head of our team in the parade. We got all
kinds of cheers as people were especially enthralled to see
Roy and Darren marching with the workers doing all kinds of
crazy stuff as they tried to march to the beat of the drums.
After the parade festivities were over I headed back down
town with Clarisse and a few other agro workers to take in
some of the fun. Darren went back to the house to pack
before he and Roy headed back to the Mayors party. I
hung out with Clarisse until nearly 10:30 that night. We
had a lot of fun but it was also very sad at the same time.
We saw all kinds of people we knew from church absolutely
drunk in the name of the holiday. It seems as though all
the people who would normally never do such a thing
transformed into some one else. Clarisse and I ended the
night in tears on our knees praying for our friends to
remain faithful to their convictions and that no one would
be injured. There were a number of motorbike-taxi accidents
because of excessive speed and drunk driving.
Saturday, we were honoured by the agroforestry staff at a
going away/Christmas party at our house. The wives of many
of the workers prepared goat, beef and greens (just for me)
and we gathered, wives included!, on our veranda for a
feast. We were so encouraged by the presence of all our
staff and their willingness to have their wives eat with us
(not a normal thing). I specifically asked if they would
mind inviting their wives as I know many of them and wanted
to say good-bye to them as well. Chrysler, one of the two
head guys who I have travelled a lot with and given lots of
counsel too, made such a nice speech and read a beautiful
prayer from Colossians that he asked me to pray on behalf of
the workers. When it came time to pray I couldnt hold
out any longer and the tears started to flow. I think I
really surprised the guys. I have a reputation of being
pretty tough so I think it was good for them to see my more
vulnerable side. Even Chrysler had tears in his eyes.
Sunday night after a nice meal and Sunday service with the
missionaries I headed down to Clarisses house. To my
surprise, all the Nguebe siblings from Gamboula had gathered
there to wait for me. Clarisse, Nadege, Severene, Eloi,
Berenice, Regi (a cousin), Hortence (Mathews wife
visiting from Berberati), and a few of the older kids had
gathered in the living room. I arrived around 9:00pm
prepared to stay up all night. Once I got settled in my
spot and the laughing subsided, Eloi brought out a new
cassette player and a blank cassette. They had devised a
plan to record the group of us singing songs onto the
cassette for me to bring back to Canada so I can be reminded
of them. By 12:30 am we had filled up both sides of the
cassette, laughed at each other a lot and had a really good
time breaking up our sadness. I eventually crawled
into bed at 1:00am only to be up at 4:30am filled with the
dread of sadness I knew would come that day.
Monday morning I was up early finishing up all the things I
had neglected to do the week before. After running around
all morning, saying various good-byes it was time to think
about leaving for the airport. We had a lunch date with Roy
and Aleta but I couldnt think about food at all. Instead
I took off for the Garden of Eden to have a good cry that
had been building up all morning. By the time I got out of
the garden there were people waiting for me at the garden
entrance to say their goodbyes, Nadege, Mama Maggie, both in
tears in no time. Once we had everything all packed up the
agroforestry staff said they ALL wanted to accompany me down
to the airport. We loaded everyone up in the agroforestry
truck, nearly 20 people, and took our funeral like drive
down the airport. I sat in the front with Eloi, my big
brother, on one side driving, and Clarisse, my big sister,
on the other side. Clarisse and I cried nearly the whole
way there and poor Eloi was doing all he could to hold it
all together. The plane was a little late so we tried to
lighten the mood some sitting under the hot sun. Once the
plane arrived and the guys got to refuelling, different
staff pulled me aside to say their personal goodbyes, their
thanks for various things and my last words of counsel.
There was also a lot of just staring at one another, words
exchanged without being spoken. When it was time to get in
and go the guys formed a long receiving line towards the
plane (African style) and we filed along it giving hugs and
shaking hands. Once the plane started up so did I, the
sound of my tears drowned out by the noise of the engine.
It was so painful to see all my dear friends, men and women
alike left standing there, eyes welling up with silent
tears.
So here we are in Yaoundé, waiting for our flight back to
Victoria tomorrow. If not for the continuing education that
is really going to be very helpful for our return back to
CAR, I am not sure I would have left just yet. Change is a
part of life, I know, but it doesnt always have to be
easy. I realise even more so now in my departure, that what
I contributed to Gamboula was far more than just planting a
few trees and establishing productive gardens. These things
are good, but the real work happened in the relationships,
the lives I influenced, the hearts that changed. One of my
workers wives came to me on Sunday to thank me for working
so closely with her husband. She said before I came there
was no peace in their house. He would be away with other
women for days at a time, only to come back drunk, rough her
up and leave again. Now, after these last two years, peace
has returned, he sleeps at home, he no longer hits her and
things are slowly improving. Love is starting to appear in
their home. She says it is because of my counselling her
husband and the example of Darren and Is marriage. What
an honour to be a part of transforming lives. And what an
honour it will be to one day soon return to CAR to be used
by God to transform more lives in his name.
I will write again on Monday when we are home and give you a
glimpse of reverse culture shock and all the things that
makes us look like a couple of people who just left the
jungle for the big city!
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Rainy Days
We had two great weeks with Phil Hudson, President of NMSI, Angela Nelson, former ECHO intern and on staff with NMSI, and Twila Schofeld, an illustrator with NMSI. The girls had lots of projects to work on in Gamboula and we had a lot of opportunity to talk with Phil, gain valuable insights into our ministry as well as having the opportunity to dream about what the possibilities are for the future. It was a very encouraging visit and we will have fun stories to share with them in the future.
Since their departure I left for a week with Chrysler, the main seminar teacher for Agroforesterie, Eloi, our new agri chauffeur and one of my older Nguebe brothers, and Romeo, one of the agri labourers. We left on a Monday with the plan to visit 6 agroforesterie cooperatives in the Southern region. The truck is only a two seater so Chrysler and Romeo rode in the back while I sat in the cab with Eloi. I know Eloi pretty well and I have travelled with Chrysler before but out in the villages I am not known as 'me' really. The cooperatives know me, or about me, but most everyone still has pre-conceived ideas about what a white girl can and can't do, where she can sleep and what she can eat. It has been my goal to slowly if not forcefully break down some of these stereotypes, not for all white girls in general necessarily (I know some who would not sleep where I have) but for myself and the guys with whom I work. It is hard to be the real me, when you are shrouded with stereotypes of who you should be. Chrysler said he likes to travel with me because it gives him a kick when he gets back to Gamboula and people ask him what I ate, where I slept, did I use the outhouse? He loves to see their reaction when he says that I did everything the same as their own wife would have done! I had an especially hard time in Sosso-Nakombo, as we had arrived shortly after a bandit attack some 30km away. It was far enough away for my feeling of safety but not for everyone else's. When they saw I was with the agri team they sprung into action to find me a comfortable place to sleep. Thus, I was swiftly delivered to two wonderful nuns at the local Catholic mission where I was locked in for the night along with our truck. I must say, after two very cold nights of fitful sleep, I had a wonderful sleep in the mission house, with running water and warm blankets (yes, I get very cold here as well). It weighed on my conscience though. What makes my life that much more valuable that I am safely tucked away in a comfortable house and my colleagues are sleeping on the floor somewhere. Don't get me wrong, I understand all the cultural nuances, but it still bothered me. At that moment I counted their lives more valuable as each of them has a wife and children to look after and I don't.
The purpose of our trip was to meet with each cooperative and to visit as many tree gardens as possible. In Sosso, we walked more than 8km, through some beautiful rainforest and savannah in order to look at 4 tree gardens. It was a long walk but most satisfying. At one point we had to take off our shoes and walk through 100m of water up to our knees. I had to fight to get to go on this walk as the village coop members didn't think I could walk that far or through such conditions. It was Chrysler who finally convinced them I would be fine, after a hard glare from me. The whole transaction was in Gbaya so I am not sure what all got said but I heard enough to know there was some doubt as to my hardiness.
Five days later we were back in Gamboula and I have been working closely with Medard and Chrysler to get them settled in their jobs before we leave. Chrysler is now responsible for writing reports so I have been advising him on how to do this. It has been a learning opportunity for me as well so I am thankful for the chance to work with the two of them. They have really grown in their abilities and in the respect the other workers and missionaries have for them. We had to let go two employees this last week and that has been difficult but essential for the continuation of the agroforestery ministry.
With only three weeks left we are busy getting things prepared for those taking up the slack behind us. I am leaving the nutrition project in capable hands but we have a few details yet to iron out. As I am not known for my patience when it comes to packing up and leaving, I am going to go on one more trip with the agri team next Sunday through Saturday. That leaves me with only two weeks here to work and get organized/packed. I will be heading up north to give a seminar to a women's cooperative (finally) and then will continue on with Chrysler and Eloi on their visits with 6 agroforestery cooperatives in the region. Darren will be busy in Gamboula getting computers sorted out, backed up and ready to turn over to the hospital.
I will be leaving here having accomplished and learned more than I first imagined. I am excited to write about my up-coming trip as well as the various parties we will be attending. Between Clarisse and I the tears are already flowing but I am determined to come back for a visit next January to do a control on the various projects while Roy is away on furlough.
From the heart of Africa, Angela